I Came, I Saw, I... May Have Not Conquered, But I Survived :)

I guess this is it, isn't it? Our group projects have been presented, our paper topics discussed, and our blogs churned out. We've uncovered epiphanies spanning from 'The Four Quartets' by T.S. Eliot to 'Teaching a Stone to Talk' by Annie Dillard to 'Hamlet' by Sir William Shakespeare. We have immersed ourselves in a heightened sense of being; we have been in it, on the outside, around, through, and far in between. Now, we are moving forward into the unknown, the culmination of this class leading to the beginning of another life ... in our end is always, most certainly, our beginning.

I entered the class with little expectation; I only knew I would be at the hands of one of the most delicious minds at Montana State University (Dr. Michael Sexson) and I was thankful for the opportunity. The last class I had to which I was completely and totally attached was my British Literature Class taught by Kimberly Myers, and now I find myself on the verge of walking away from another class to which I have an attachment. I'm attached to these minds I've shared the space with, I'm attached to the ideas we have been kicking around for the semester, and it makes me melancholy that I will not have the opportunity to meet with this group every week. I know I wrote my final paper on the idea of light epiphanies rising out of melancholy experiences, but I can't help but feel tormented by moving on. Still, I know I have to!

I hope each and every person in the class was able to take away the same things I was able to, and I hope everyone has the chance to appreciate what Dr. Sexson has given us. He has given us new breath, a new way to view the world, and helpful tools which will help us when we feel we are incapable of surviving. I just want to extend a thank you to Dr. Sexson for reaching me in a way that very few Professors have during my six-year stint as an English major. Your passion for literature and for awakening the minds of your students has been an inspiration, a comfort, and also a huge push forward, and I thank you deeply for that. I have been absent at times this semester, both physically and mentally, but I think that is the curse of all the graduating seniors who are spending a lot of time thinking about the future and not so much time thinking about their present lives, something Lisa Meyer explored heavily in her final paper. I'm just thrilled to know that I have a future, and a college undergraduate degree will only push me further into the world and help me do things I had almost given up on doing.

I wouldn't trade the ups and downs and 'back and forths' of this journey for anything. I believe all of my trials, successes, and failures have led me to this moment, at this keyboard, writing these words, and at the end of the day I don't think I would change anything. I've always heard that regret is a wasted emotion, so I am going to let go of regret and only think about what is happening today and what is possible in the future, because that's all I have control over now. I have met some of the most incredible people and been part very special, sacred moments I will always carry with me. Life is full of moments, as we've been learning this semester, and how one deals with and cultivates these moments is part of the fun of living! So, go out and LIVE, English Majors!! I wish you all luck in your pursuits and know, from personal experience, that you are all capable of doing the most amazing things. Like Lester Bangs said in 'Almost Famous', 'You'll meet them all again on your long journey to the middle'. I hope I do. I really hope I do. :)

Thank you, thank you ... a thousand times, thank you, Dr. Michael Sexson. I adore you.